Smart Guys.
30.
Dis, da tings Jakeh boy Agur tell. He get one real importan message fo tell fo God. Dis wat da guy tell to Itiel, an to Ukal too: 
Cuz I know I one dumb buggah, an mo like one animal den one guy. I no undastan wat peopo suppose to undastan. 
I neva learn how fo know wat fo do erytime, An da stuff dat da God Dat Stay Good An Spesho know, I donno. 
You know, no mo nobody but God Can go up inside da sky, Den come back down hea. No mo nobody Can hold da wind inside his two hand Fo make um blow o no blow. No mo nobody Can wrap his coat aroun da ocean fo carry um. No mo nobody Can make da whole world, even da mos far places. If you know somebody dat can do all dat, Let me know who him an wat his name! Let me know who his boy an wat his boy name! 
Eryting God tell, You know az true Wen you trus him fo take kea you. He jalike one shield fo you no get hurt. 
No go tell, God tell someting An he neva tell dat. If you do dat, God goin show dat you stay wrong, An peopo goin find out, you one bulaia. 
Eh God! Get two tings I like aks you fo do fo me befo I mahke! No tell me you no like do um. 
Firs, no let me do wase time kine stuff O bulai odda peopo. Nex, no let me come pooa so I no mo notting, An no give me mo stuff den I need. Jus make me feel good wit enuff food an tings fo wat I need. 
No good I get eryting I like get, An den ack jalike I donno you, God, An tell, “Who Da One In Charge?! He no mean notting fo me!” An no good I come real pooa so I no mo notting, An den I start fo steal stuffs from odda peopo, An give you, my God, one bad rep. 
No talk bad to one boss guy bout his worka guy. Cuz da worka guy goin tell God, an God goin hurt you, An punish you lidat. 
Get da kine peopo Dat tell God fo hurt dea faddah An no tell God fo do good tings fo dea muddah. 
Dey da kine peopo Dat tink no mo notting wrong wit dem. An inside, dey pilau. Dey no let nobody make um come clean inside. 
Dey da kine peopo Dat ack jalike dey mo betta den erybody. Az why wen dey look at you, dey ack jalike you notting. 
An dat kine peopo, Dey like wipe out da peopo dat no mo powa From all ova da world. Dey like wipe out da peopo dat need help So dey no need help um an dey go way. Dey jalike one wild animal Dat get sharp teets, jalike one sword o knife! 
Da leech, da kine dat suck yoa blood, get two girls, Dea names, “Suck!” an “Suck!” An get three odda tings Dat keep sucking an not enuff yet fo dem: 
Da Mahke Peopo Place, Da kine wahine dat no can get hapai, Da kine groun dat erytime need watta. An numba four, da kine dat no goin tell, “Nuff awready!”: Az da fire dat erytime need mo wood. 
Da kine guys dat make fun a dea faddah An tink dey big, dey no need do wat dea muddah tell um fo do, Da crow birds dat live inside da valley Goin poke out dea eye, An da scavenja birds goin eat dea mahke body. 
Get three ting dat too much fo me, I no can undastan: 
How da eagle can go inside da sky? How da snake can go on top one big rock? How da big boat can go inside da middo a da deep ocean? An da numba four ting dat I no can undastan, cuz I donno: How one guy make um fo one young wahine like um?! Dis too, too much fo me fo undastan! 
An I no undastan dis too: How one wahine can fool aroun behind her husban back, Den jus go bafe fo come clean, An she tink, “Eh, I neva do notting wrong!” 
Get three tings dat hard fo peopo handle, all ova da world: 
Wen one slave come dea king, Wen one stupid guy get real plenny fo eat an drink, 
Wen one ol wahine dat erybody no like find one husban, An numba four, dat nobody in da world can handle, Wen one slave wahine take ova da house from da lady she work fo! 
Get four ting on top da groun dat stay real small, But dey real akamai: 
Da ants, dey not real strong, But summa time, Dey make shua dey get plenny food Fo las dem da whole year. 
Da rock hyrax, dey no stay strong too, But dey know how fo make dea house Inside da cracks in da big cliffs, fo hide. 
Da locust, da ones dey look jalike grasshoppa, Dey no mo one king, But dey know how fo move all togedda, Jalike dey one army. 
Da gecko, you can catch um wit yoa hand, But dey even live wea da king live. 
Get three ting, wen you spock um, You tink, “Nice, how dey move!” 
Da lion, from all da animals, He da mos strong one, An he no turn aroun an run away from nobody. 
Da roosta dat hold up his head wen he walk, Da billy goat dat lead da odda sheeps an goats. An numba four, da one dat move real nice kine too, One king marching wit his army guys. 
If you do stupid kine stuff An ack jalike you importan, O if you tink real hard bout how fo do someting bad, You betta stop it right now! 
You put milk in one bag an put presha, You get sof cheese. You squeeze yoa nose an put presha, You get one bleed nose. You put presha on one guy an make um mad, You get one fight! 
