1 Kings.
22.
Had three year, da Aram peopo an da Israel peopo neva make war. 
Den, afta three year no mo war, King Jehoshafat from Judah side go fo see King Ahab, Israel side. 
Wen Jehoshafat stay Israel side, Ahab an his helpa guys talk. He tell, “You guys know, da town Ramot Gilead, dass oua land. But da king fo da Aram peopo, he wen take um away from us befo time. An us guys no do notting fo get um back from him!” 
Den he aks Jehoshafat, “You go wit me fo make war Ramot Gilead side?” Jehoshafat tell da Israel king, “Shoots, I go! Me an you, stay real tight. My peopo an my horses, dey stay yoas.” 
But Jehoshafat tell Ahab dis: “Firs ting, us guys gotta aks Da One In Charge if az good fo go make war, o not.” 
Az why King Ahab tell all da guys dat talk fo his god Baal fo come togedda. Get bout 400 dem. He aks dem, “I can go make war agains Ramot Gilead town, o not?” Dey tell um, “Go make war, King Ahab. Oua main god we pray to, goin give you da town.” 
But Jehoshafat tell, “Ova hea, no mo one talka fo Da One In Charge, fo us find out wat Da One In Charge tink, o wat?” 
King Ahab tell, “Still get one guy I can aks um wat Da One In Charge tink. But I hate da buggah! Weneva he talk fo Da One In Charge, he no tell me notting good! He erytime tell bad tings goin happen to me! His name, Mikaiah, Imlah boy.” King Jehoshafat tell, “Eh, brah, no good you talk lidat!” 
So da Israel king, Ahab, tell one a his palace guys fo come. Ahab tell um, “Quick! Go tell Mikaiah, Imlah boy, fo come right now.” 
Da two king guys, Ahab da king fo da Israel peopo an Jehoshafat da king fo da Judah peopo, wear dea king kine robes. Dey sit on top two throne, wea you go inside da Samaria town gate. Get one wide open place dea wea da peopo come fo take da junks outa da wheat, afta dey cut da wheat down. Dis time, inside dis wide place, all da guys dat talk fo dea gods stay in front da two kings, an tell wat dea gods tell. 
Had one a da guys dat talk fo dea gods name Zedekiah, Kenaanah boy, wen make tings dat look jalike bull horns outa iron. He tell, “Dis wat Da One In Charge tell. You goin push wit dese horns fo bus up da Aram army guys, till you wipe um out!” 
All da odda guys dat talk fo dea gods, dey stay tell da same ting too. Dey tell, “Go attack Ramot Gilead an win da war! Cuz Da One In Charge goin give da town to oua king!” 
Da messenja guy dat go fo tell Mikaiah fo come by da king, he tell Mikaiah, “You see how all da guys dat talk fo da odda gods tell da same ting, dat da king goin win da war?! So, good you tell da same ting jalike dem!” 
But Mikaiah tell, “Jalike fo shua Da One In Charge stay alive, I stay shua too bout da ony ting I goin tell him! Az wat Da One In Charge goin tell me!” 
Den Mikaiah come by King Ahab. Da king aks him, “Mikaiah! We goin go attack Ramot Gilead town? O we no do notting?” Mikaiah tell him, “Go attack um an win da war! Cuz Da One In Charge goin give da town to oua king!” 
Da king tell um, “How many times I gotta make you promise fo tell me ony da trut, wen you talk fo Da One In Charge?!” 
Den Mikaiah tell, “I see, jalike was one dream, All da Israel guys running all ova da hills, Jalike sheeps dat no mo sheep guy fo take kea dem. Da One In Charge tell me, ‘All dis guys, no mo boss fo dem. Let um all go home, An let eryting come good fo dem.’” 
Da Israel king tell King Jehoshafat, “Jalike I wen tell you bout dis Mikaiah guy. Weneva he talk fo Da One In Charge, he no tell me someting good goin happen to me. Ony bad kine stuff!” 
Den Mikaiah tell some moa: “Az why you betta lissen dis ting wat Da One In Charge tell! “I wen see Da One In Charge. He stay sit on top his throne. All da armies inside da sky, Dey stan aroun him, on da right side an on da lef side. 
“Da One In Charge aks um, ‘Who goin bulai King Ahab, so he go attack Ramot Gilead town, an mahke dea?’ Some a dem tell one ting, an some tell odda tings. 
“Den one spirit come an stan in front Da One In Charge, an tell, ‘Me, I goin bulai him.’ “Da One In Charge aks him, ‘How you goin do dat?’ 
“Da spirit tell, ‘I goin go ova dea an be one spirit dat make all da guys dat talk fo his gods bulai him wen dey talk.’ “Da One In Charge tell, ‘Good idea! You goin bulai all dem! Go, do jalike you tell!’ 
“An dass wat you see stay happen right now. Da One In Charge wen sen one spirit fo make all dese guys dat talk fo yoa gods, bulai wen dey open dea mout. Az cuz Da One In Charge tell, someting real bad goin happen to you!” 
Den Zedekiah, Kanaanah boy, go ova dea an slap Mikaiah head. He tell, “So! How da spirit from Da One In Charge goin leave me, fo go ova dea talk to you, aah?!” 
Mikaiah tell Zedekiah, “Fo you, you goin know I tell da trut fo real kine, wen you go run inside one room inside one house fo hide!” 
Den da king fo da Israel peopo tell his guys, “Take Mikaiah back by Amon, da Samaria mayor guy, an by my boy Joash. 
Tell um, ‘Dis wat da king tell: Put dis guy in jail. Give um ony litto bit jail kine bread an watta, till I come back da winna.’” 
But Mikaiah tell da king, “Fo shua, if bumbye you come back an you okay, dat mean, Da One In Charge neva give me notting fo tell!” An Mikaiah tell da peopo, “Eh, all you peopo! No foget wat you wen hear!” 
So, Ahab da king fo da Israel peopo an Jehoshafat da king fo da Judah peopo go togedda fo attack Ramot Gilead. 
Ahab tell Jehoshafat, “Befo I go fight, I goin dress so nobody know who me. But you, wear yoa regula kine king robe.” So da Israel king dress so nobody know who him, an go fight. 
Befo dey start fight, da king fo da Aram peopo tell da 32 officer guys dat in charge a his war wagons, wat dey gotta do. He tell um, “No need fight da regula army guys o da officer guys. Jus make shua you kill da one guy, Ahab da Israel king!” 
So wen da officer guys in charge a da war wagons see Jehoshafat get da king kine robe, dey tink, “Az him! Da Israel king!” So dey turn da war wagons fo go attack him. But den Jehoshafat yell who him, 
an da officer guys in charge a da war wagons see he not da Israel king, so dey turn away an no chase him no moa. 
But one a da Aram army guys shoot one mo arrow, ony fo shoot. Da arrow wack Ahab da Israel king in da puka wea da front part a da body armor come togedda wit da side part. Da king tell da army guy dat drive his war wagon, “Turn aroun quick! Get me away from da fighting! I wack!” 
All day, da two armies stay fight. Da king helpa guys put King Ahab inside his war wagon fo him sit dea an see da Aram army. But Ahab stay bleed plenny, so get blood all ova da bottom a da war wagon. Late aftanoon, Ahab mahke. 
Wen da sun almos go down, da Israel army guys all start fo yell, “Erybody go back yoa town! Erybody go back yoa land!” 
Dass how King Ahab mahke. Da army guys bring his body back Samaria town, an dey bury him dea. 
Da king guys take da king war wagon by one watta place Samaria side, wea da wahines dat fool aroun fo money go fo bafe. Da guys wash down da war wagon dea, an da dogs suck up da blood from da king, jalike da message from Da One In Charge wen tell befo time. 
Had odda stuff happen wen Ahab stay king. All da tings he wen do—da palace he wen build wit ivory kine decoration, da towns he wen put strong wall aroun—all dat stay write inside da Record Book Fo Da Israel Kings. 
Dey bury Ahab by his ancesta guys. Ahab boy Ahaziah come da nex king. 
Now, dis, da Jehoshafat story, bout Asa boy. He come king fo da Judah peopo, da numba four year dat Ahab stay king fo da Israel peopo. 
Jehoshafat was 35 year ol wen he come king, an he stay king Jerusalem side 25 year. His muddah name Azubah, an her faddah Shilhi. 
Eryting Jehoshafat do, he do um jalike his faddah Asa. He neva go da wrong way, he ony do da kine stuff Da One In Charge tell stay right. Still yet, all da sacrifice place on da top a da hills still stay dea. Da peopo still stay make sacrifice fo da odda gods an burn incense dea. 
Jehoshafat an Ahab da Israel king, dey neva fight each odda. 
Had odda stuff happen wen Jehoshafat stay king too. All da tings he wen do—how him an his army guys fight da odda kings—all dat stay write inside da Record Book Fo Da Kings Fo Judah. 
Had guys dat fool aroun da wahines fo get money from dem fo da temples fo da odda gods, an dey still stay do dat even afta Asa was da king. Jehoshafat throw out all dem guys outa his land. 
Dat time, da Edom peopo no mo king. Ony had one territorial govna from Jehoshafat stay in charge ova dea. 
Jehoshafat wen do anodda ting, he tell his guys fo build plenny big boats fo carry plenny stuffs far away. He like dem go Yemen side fo bring back da Ofir kine gold dat come from ova dea. But da boats neva go dea, dey all sink Ezion-Geber side. 
Dat time King Ahaziah, Ahab boy, tell Jehoshafat, “Let my saila guys go wit yoa saila guys inside da big boats.” But Jehoshafat neva like, so dey no go. 
Den Jehoshafat mahke, an dey bury him by his ancesta guys inside David Town, az Jerusalem, cuz he come from King David. Jehoshafat boy Jehoram come da nex king. 
Da numba 17 year Jehoshafat was king Judah side, Ahaziah, Ahab boy, come da king fo da Israel peopo Samaria side. He da king fo da Israel peopo two year. 
He do stuff Da One In Charge tell az bad, cuz he do jalike his faddah an his muddah. He ack jalike Jeroboam, Nebat boy, ack befo time, da guy dat wen make da Israel peopo do bad kine stuff. 
Ahaziah get da Baal god fo his boss. He go down in front Baal an pray to him. He make Da One In Charge, da God fo da Israel peopo, get real mad, cuz Ahaziah ack jalike his faddah Ahab.
