18
Mikaiah Talk Bad Bout Ahab
(1 Kings 22:1-28)
1 Dat time, Jehoshafat da Judah king get plenny rich kine stuff, an da peopo get respeck fo him. He make frenz wit Ahab, da king fo Israel, cuz his boy marry Ahab girl. 2 Afta some year, Jehoshafat go from Jerusalem to Samaria town fo visit Ahab. Ahab kill plenny sheeps an goats an cows fo Jehoshafat an da peopo wit him. Den Ahab try make Jehoshafat tink az good fo go attack da peopo Ramot-Gilead town. 3 Ahab aks Jehoshafat, “You goin go wit me fo go agains da peopo inside Ramot Gilead, o wat?”
Jehoshafat tell um, “I jalike you, an my peopo jalike yoa peopo. We go wit you an make war ova dea.” 4 But Jehoshafat tell da Israel king, “Firs ting, gotta aks Da One In Charge right now wat he tell.”
5 So Ahab bring togedda da guys dat talk fo da gods, four hundred guys, an aks dem, “We go make war agains da Ramot-Gilead guys? O mo betta I no go?”
Dey tell, “Go, cuz da gods goin give you da powa fo win!”
6 But Jehoshafat aks, “Wot?! No mo even one guy still yet dat talk fo Da One In Charge ova hea, fo us aks him?!”
7 Da Israel king tell Jehoshafat, “Yeah, get one guy still yet, dat can aks Da One In Charge fo us guys wass goin happen. But I hate da buggah, cuz he no tell notting good from God bout me, eva! Ony bad kine stuff erytime! Az Mikaiah, Imlah boy.”
Jehoshafat tell, “Eh, you one king! Mo betta you no talk lidat.”
8 So Ahab tell one a his palace guys come, an tell um, “Bring Mikaiah, Imlah boy, real fas!”
9 Da king fo Israel an Jehoshafat, da king fo Judah, get on dea king kine clotheses, an sit on top dea thrones by da place wea peopo split dea wheat an barley from da junk kine stuff, by da door fo da gate fo Samaria town. An all da guys dat talk fo da gods tell wat message dey get in front da king guys. 10 One a dem, Zedekiah Kenaanah boy, wen make iron tings dat look jalike cow horns, an he tell, “Dis da message from Da One In Charge: ‘Wit dese horns you goin stab da Aram guys till dey come wipe out!’ ”
11 All da odda guys dat talk fo da gods stay tell da king da same ting. Dey tell, “Go attack Ramot-Gilead, an win! Cuz Da One In Charge goin give um to you!”
12 Da messenja guy dat wen go fo tell Mikaiah come, tell um, “Look! Dey stick togedda jalike dey one, da odda guys dat talk fo da gods stay tell good kine stuff, dat da Israel king goin win. Make shua wat you tell, stay same same, an tell good kine stuff.”
13 But Mikaiah tell, “I stay shua Da One In Charge stay alive! Az why I stay shua too, dat wat my God tell me, az da ony ting I can tell Ahab!”
14 Wen Mikaiah come, Ahab aks him, “Eh Mikaiah! Us guys goin make war agains da Ramot-Gilead peopo? O mo betta I hold back?”
Mikaiah tell, “Shoots, brah, go afta dem an win! Cuz you goin get powa ova dem, aah?”
15 Ahab tell him, “How many times I gotta tell you fo make one strong promise to me, dat you goin tell ony da trut, wen you talk fo Da One In Charge?!”
16 ✡Den Mikaiah tell, “Kay den. I see jalike one dream—all da Israel peopo stay scatta all ova da hills, jalike sheeps dat no mo sheep guy fo take kea dem. An Da One In Charge tell, ‘No mo leada fo dese peopo! Good, erybody go back home, cuz eryting stay okay fo dem.’ ”
17 Den Ahab tell Jehoshafat, “Ho! I wen tell you, aah? Wen dis guy talk fo Da One In Charge, he no tell notting good bout me eva, ony bad kine stuff!”
18 An Mikaiah talk some moa. He tell “Az why you guys gotta lissen wat Da One In Charge tell: I see dis, jalike one dream—Da One In Charge stay sit on top his throne wit all his peopo inside da sky standing by his right side an his lef side. 19 An Da One In Charge tell, ‘Who goin make Ahab, da Israel king, tink he gotta go attack Ramot-Gilead, fo him mahke ova dea?!’
“One spirit tell one ting, an anodda one tell anodda ting. 20 In da end, one spirit come an stan in front Da One In Charge. Da spirit tell Da One In Charge, ‘I goin make Ahab like do how you tell.’
“Da One In Charge aks, ‘How?’
21 “Da spirit tell, ‘I goin make jalike one spirit dat bulai. So den wen all da guys dat talk fo his gods tell someting, dey goin bulai!’
“Da One In Charge tell, ‘Den you make Ahab tink he can go. Shoots! Do wat you wen tell!’
22 “Mikaiah tell, ‘So now, look. Dis wat wen happen. Da One In Charge wen put one spirit dat bulai inside da mout a all dese guys dat talk fo yoa gods. But Da One In Charge tell, dat one real bad kine ting goin happen to you!’ ”
23 Den Zedekiah, Kenaanah boy, go an slap Mikaiah head. He aks, “Wat way dat spirit from Da One In Charge go wen he go from me fo tell you fo bulai me, aah?!”
24 Mikaiah tell, “You know wat?! Wen you go run fo hide inside one room, an den anodda—az wen you goin find out!”
25 Ahab, da Israel king tell, “Take Mikaiah back by Amon, da guy in charge a Samaria town, an by my boy Joash. 26 Tell um, ‘Dis wat King Ahab tell: Throw dis buggah inside da prison, an ony give him prison kine bread an watta till I come back an I okay.’ ”
27 Mikaiah tell, “If you eva come back okay, den Da One In Charge no use me fo talk fo him.” Den he tell, “Eh all you peopo! Lissen, wat I wen tell!”
Ahab Mahke Ramot-Gilead Side
(1 Kings 22:29-36)
28 So Ahab da Israel king an Jehoshafat da Judah king go attack Ramot-Gilead town. 29 Ahab tell Jehoshafat, “I goin wear odda kine clotheses wen I go fight, so nobody know az me. But you, wear yoa king kine clotheses.” So Ahab, da Israel king, wear da kine clotheses fo anodda guy, an dey go fight.
30 Da Aram king wen tell his officer guys in charge a da war wagons, “Ony attack da Israel king! No fight wit odda guys, no matta dey importan o not importan!”
31 Wen da leada guys inside da war wagons see Jehoshafat, dey tink, “Dass da Israel king!” So dey turn dea war wagons fo go afta him. But Jehoshafat yell to Da One In Charge fo help him, an pull dose guys away from him. 32 Wen da officer guys inside da war wagons see dat he not da Israel king, dey pau chase him.
33 But somebody shoot one arrow from dea bow, jus fo pau shoot. He wack Ahab da Israel king wea two piece a da body armor come togedda. Ahab tell da guy dat drive his war wagon, “Turn aroun an get me outa da fight! Dat arrow wen hit me!” 34 Da two armies fight mo an mo all day. Ahab still stay sit up inside his war wagon, wea he can see da Aram guys till almos sun down time. Den wen da sun go down, Ahab mahke.
✡ 18:16 18:16: Census 27:17; Ezek 34:5; Matt 9:36; Mark 6:34